The Vampire in her is good!

by MeeraMayaa
Yes, I do have a Vampire and Owl within me!
Maybe you have one or rather you may have packed it in the corner most place in your headspace.
It’s important to speak with the Owls, Vampires, and Hyenas within us
They understand us better than the Homosapien part 😀
This is an inside out.
When I shared a picture of mine, which was clicked around 13 years back, I thought I should also share the journey I traveled.
The journey may not necessarily be a lesson but I feel it’s an experience for sure that I cherish that I embraced and learned this art to travel within ❤️

This girl,
she had loads of dreams and a twinkle in her eyes!

Also, lived a vampire within her!

That vampire, which didn’t suck anyone’s red liquid!

The neurons within were a volcano each!

People around her didn’t know about her dream,

What they knew was,
She will smile!

She will smile when Sun kisses her forehead
She smiles when the rain caresses her mane
She smiled when someone asked her for a help
She smiled even when she was belittled!

But,
What did those five letters mean
When,
She stood in front of the mirror.

The mirror said,
“Stop it, you can fool the world but not yourself”!

Beginning of my career ladder,
A ladder that never had a vision,
It was just traveling through a smog!

Sometimes, being appreciated,
Sometimes I felt that appreciation didn’t have meaning!

Everything was a target,
A target I was!

I stage full of confusions,
A space with questions
Why am I here?
What’s my aspiration?

I dreaded and it gave chills down my spine!

Forced was I to stay motivated, but, didn’t know what that word meant?

Am I outcasted for not being able to overachieve my target?
Will I be outcasted for not full-filing the prescribed syllabus?

The syllabus of name and fame!
The syllabus to satisfy the near and dear.

The unseen thread of words strangulating me,
for not bearing fruit in my abdomen!

Hiding the tears behind my pearls,
Flashing those Calcium enameled structures
in front of the Gyn to let her work on the procedures.
The needles or the pieces of equipment didn’t hurt me as much as, than
the words traveling sharp as a razor!

Even the parlor visits!!

I cursed myself for smiling at anyone
Well, it wasn’t the child within me,
It was the soul that smiled!

Several times the eyebrows,
Well,
Only one was done!

I left halfway, as the tears were heavier than the one
that traveled down due to the uprooting!

The little sparrow in me always flipped her wings,
But, words tried all its best to clip it!

Still, I fought!
Not by hitting or strangulating them with words!

I went quiet,
Several days and months!
No one knew what I was digging within me,
They all saw the pearls lit.

I smiled even in the semi-conscious state,
when the Doctor excised the tumor out.
I said, “Thanks for staying these many days in me” and slipped unconscious.

Then,
I thought it was better I spoke to the external mass
But didn’t know that I let this mass grow within me!

Is it awakening or a slap,
But, it was worth either wise!

I let so many people and so many things behind,

Well, they didn’t.
I left their behavior!

I embraced myself.

I realized it’s waste of time in convincing others,
And, I turned inward!

To date, it’s this direction that has created an ecosystem of peace within me!

I let the Vampire and Owl grow,

Because I felt that their smile is True!

 

 

 

 

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